Hello my 39ers, happy new year!
I know, it’s early, but writing this blog has become life. I said I would be making changes around these parts, so here they are:
1) I have made a contact email, its more a hopeful thing. If I could find sponsors that would only make bringing you the 39th just that much easier. I’m talking to you Travelocity.
2) I have created a posting schedule! I will post every two days starting from Monday. (M, TH,S)
3) I’m here to make you feel special. I want you to feel human, meaning that you’re not alone in this. I don’t know you, nor probably will I ever, but I care.
This my friends is the 39th
So on with this crazy blog. I spent the last few weeks traveling and exploring America, and boy is she beautiful. I found myself glancing out of large windows that depicted a world far different from the one that I was use to. This would begin my journey toward adventure and my pursuit of diversity. I will reveal what I learned and recount all my adventures in my next blog, but for now I’m going to skip ahead to what happend when I returned.
I personally find the most noble trait to be endurance, but I never expected to see it shown so well by a little brown bird.
It was early New Years Eve, the sky was foggy but somehow still bright. I was throwing crackers at birds with my fiancé until I noticed a brave face. In a crowd of Pigeons and other little brown birds, there she was. A small brown bird with a mangled left leg and a twisted neck. She was so beautiful.
Although she was disfigured and at a disadvantage, she still dove into the crowd of birds fighting for mere crumbs. I watched her slowly hobble after pieces her fellow birds chased with ease, but then it happend, she flew. I watched this small mangled bird sore. Its face haunted me for days.
I want to say we all feel like that bird, but then I realize why its face haunted me so. It seems to be second nature to see something that doesn’t mimic a certain standard and begin to pitty sed thing. That bird was a lot stronger than most people I know, and didn’t need my pitty or assumption that it was weak. I judged skill based on minor physical deformities. In other words, I judged it by its cover. That bird held its own despite a few physical set backs and was able to still sore among its own.
Yet I still feel like the bird.
I have monster teeth, I’m underweight, and I stutter when I’m nervous or low on confidence. I can’t tell you how many times people have assumed things because of my teeth or the time it takes me to do certain physical tasks. I know what’s its like to have people already assume the worst of you or lack confidence in your ability, but all the while you could do that thing they assumed you couldn’t. I don’t understand why people do that, but hurt people hurt people.
I’ve had people make fun of my teeth and the fact that it’s hard for me to close my mouth, but unless they would like to drop thousands of dollars to correct the damage from my first time in braces, they can have several seats.
I’ve had people make fun of the fact that I can’t lift things or that I’m a little slower performing physically strenuous tasks.
I’ve had people make fun of me when I stutter, but until those self entitled jerks understand that tearing into someone who already fights every day to raise their self esteem won’t stop the stuttering, well they have their own insecurities.
Holding your own doesn’t mean being arrogant and thinking you’ve beat circumstance, it’s understanding that who you are is good enough to keep learning.
I write a blog, I’m an amateur historian, and I’m about as studious of human interaction as they come. Small physical deformities,or gained physical deformities, do not denote a lack of intelligence or skill.
In other words, get’em. You ain’t gotta prove nothing.